louds Passing Chapter 9 – Tell Me, Sivashakti

clouds Passing

Chapter 9 – Tell Me, Sivashakti

Character: Selvi Mahalakshmi

The changes in Selvi Mahalakshmi’s life were never visible from the outside.

But inside, they were happening quietly, constantly.

There were explanations everywhere.

Yet there was no clarity.

She was told that nothing had been hidden from her.

And yet, nothing was ever fully said.

Reasons never arrived directly.

They circled around conversations like shadows avoiding light.

The language remained polite.

But the meaning stayed distant.

Whenever she asked questions,

the answers came softly,

carefully,

with pauses that sounded more permanent than truth.

Silence was often treated as agreement.

Her life is an illusion picture for an autocrat; someone wins,

But in real a failed, collapsed life structure with heavy productions

There will be Autocrat vs ME

I should be strong, Ansi told, " Don't move, how much you will run or change face it.

Take your food.

i Should strength my self. they dont know there is one more layer above autocrats.

I had doubt i asked about child marks. I am disturbed by the conflict of discussion and harasments

i asked for certificated very rude

. I asked to come and buy raincoat talked like an enemy,

which i myself can't believe.

i felt like someone's husband in my home

She felt her life is always charu

getting medicine for other patients

moving without concern

all they want is to make me dummy phenomy handles everything

And slowly she understood:

Some explanations are not meant to reveal reality.

They are only meant to help people accept decisions already made.

The family said they wanted what was best for her.

But “best” always seemed to point toward only one path.

When they discussed her life,

they spoke in front of her,

yet her voice never entered the final decision.

“This is safer.”

“This is better.”

“This will avoid problems.”

The word problem appeared too often.

But to her,

the real problem was something else entirely:

But at that stage she felt

her feelings were never truly heard.

As the explanations increased,

her role became smaller.

And as her role became smaller,

her confidence quietly shrank.

When confidence shrinks,

even the silence inside a relationship changes shape.

She noticed something important:

A mother’s love cannot be measured through explanations.

It is felt through presence.

Through attention.

Through emotional memory.

When I said something wrong about children i was told to be mad

He said everything is in his control, and all are growing

Nobody openly said she had done something wrong that they knew partially.

Everything is documented on one hand in favour of phenomy and her youngest father, with so many keepers who studied with her, he looked after all of them concern

She can't picture her husband or think of his father, the womaniser running his imaginary paradise through them , a few of her past women who ran away too were in the same trap.

Yet decisions slowly moved away from her hands.

She was still there.

Still responsible.

Still carrying the weight of the household.

But her existence itself began to feel like something that required justification.

The more they explained,

the less they connected.

The less they connected,

the weaker their understanding became.

And once understanding fades,

distance enters a relationship without making noise.

Selvi Mahalakshmi realized:

i am not love god of statue.

Explanations alone cannot protect relationships.

Emotion, time, listening — these matter too.

A family may know how to create solutions.

But to preserve love,

it must also know how to listen.

Sometimes she sat quietly and wondered:

When explanations lose clarity,

in what language does a relationship continue?

Her journey moved forward.

Without visible change.

But internally,

new questions had begun to grow.

Outside the house,

everything had started sounding like fragmented public gossip —

voices running in circles around the family,

women gathering in emotional clusters,

half-concerned,

half-curious,

speaking as though another person’s life was a street performance.

For years she had watched them silently.

Never reacting.

Never fully entering their world.

Then one day,

she met a doctor.

And for the first time,

someone spoke differently.

“They are blocking emotional balance,” the doctor said quietly.

“They disturb the natural flow of opposing hormones. And whenever healing begins to reach a stable stage, they interrupt it, manipulate it, and create fresh emotional conflict.” maha

maha looked away for a moment.

“That is exactly what it feels like,” she whispered. As if something never allows me to become complete.As if I am stopped each time I begin to recover.”

Then Vikram spoke.

“That woman won,” he said bitterly.“She became the definition of completeness. And now their world tells me you are not worthy enough beside her.”

Selvi looked at him calmly.

“What does their system have to do with my life?” she asked.

Vikram laughed softly.

“A system survives by controlling the rhythm of people’s emotions. Like hands shaking bells to command movement.”

“And if that system destroys you?” she asked.

He remained silent for a moment.

“What exactly is left to destroy?” he replied.

“You live. You cry. You fall. But you never felt the urge to hold someone and collapse emotionally.”

He looked at her carefully.

“Saints don’t give that,” she said. “ They neither seek emotional possession nor allow it.”

“Family men do,” she answered.

There was another silence.

Then she admitted quietly:

“Sometimes I feel a vacuum. As if nobody truly feels for me. Or perhaps they never allow themselves to.”

“A world of emotional minors,” she said bitterly.People playing with responsibility without ever understanding its weight.”

Vikram nodded slowly.

“The man who took everything from you,” he said, “the man who used everyone around him —he built an entire crew.”

“Mmm.”

“And now even nations behave the same way. Pakistan fights endlessly for further division.”

handling a child and childish

Selvi looked at the sky through the window.

“And me?” she asked softly.

“What are you now?”

Vikram smiled faintly.

“For now,” she said, “I feel like Mauritius. An island surviving alone in the middle of larger wars.”

Where did you learn this art of living on heavy trial

i saw a World Child picture

The rescue ..only fight in war

on saty jit ray film home want they will trial with ophan like most of the managers in IT

third most important educatin rita i think

i am not with the first part, because after marriage, it has its own responsibility for both, but the next part, after the husband moves and with another woman, how she carries on her studies.

i took best things only i adapted that after collapse..